Are You a Citiot? Do You Avoid Doing These Things When Visiting the Country?

Your mother was right: it costs nothing to be polite. Quickly brushing past the locals on the street without so much as a nod isn’t just rude, it’s one of the telltale signs of the citiot.

As with Northeasterners in general, upstaters are often reputed for being aloof, but “cautious” is a better description—and this is one of the reasons why. You’ll be surprised how friendly we can be, especially if you extend yourself a little.

City transplants have made some incredible contributions to our area, opening dozens of interesting shops, restaurants, and cultural organizations. But these aren’t the only worthwhile places to visit. Since you’re looking for an authentic travel experience, make it a priority to be a patron at some of the excellent stores, cafés, music clubs, galleries, and more founded by born-and-bred locals.

We don’t want to wait in line at the grocery store, bakery, or handmade-goods shop any more than you do. But cutting, invading personal space, or barking orders at the person behind the counter won’t have the intended effect of speeding up service. What it will get you is dirty looks and colorful recommendations for how to take a hike to the back of the line. And if you catch the serviceperson on a bad day, you can expect to wait even longer for whatever you’re buying.

Yes, we live in a place where there appear to be more cows than people. No, we weren’t raised in a barn. Were you?

It might seem like a no-brainer, but you’d be shocked by the number of visitors who fail to remember basic good manners when dealing with restaurant and hotel staff, shopkeepers, healing arts therapists, mechanics, and other people in service trades. Be kind and show gratitude and you’re likely to get even better service. And don’t forget to tip whenever appropriate.

Nothing makes an upstater bristle more than hearing city folks complain about the dearth of or how expensive it is to find “good help,” from massage to landscaping to home cleaning. While rates in these parts are generally more affordable than in the city, the adage holds: if you pay peanuts, you get monkeys. Fork over a fair wage—without whining about it—and you’ll go a long way toward finding loyal help that does good work.

Likewise, nothing says “citiot” faster than asking for a discount, then carping, “If I wanted to pay that, I’d have stayed in the city!” Do this, and you’ll probably get a tart suggestion for where to take your business. (Hint: It’s not the city.)

It’s no secret that the pace of life moves a lot more deliberately in the country. So slow down and ease up, especially on the defensive driving. That traffic light turning green a nanosecond ago isn’t an invitation to lay on your horn. And zipping in and out of traffic lanes will get you to your destination about two minutes faster than if you just drove the speed limit. You’re on vacation anyway, aren’t you?

Most parks and conservation areas in the Hudson Valley are maintained by volunteers and skeleton crews who are paid to clear trails, monitor plant and animal populations, and generally make your experience safer and more pleasant. They’re not paid for janitorial services, so avoid leaving your garbage on our hiking trails and in our parks.

Take a backpack or lightweight cinch sack for toting water and snacks, and tuck an extra bag inside for refuse. Drop the inner bag in the trash on your way out. On-site garbage receptacles are full? Take your trash with you, and dispose of it at the nearest gas station or at your hotel or rental.

Your status as a second-home owner or frequent renter doesn’t automatically entitle you to occupy two parking spaces with one car, insist on the largest table or the best view in the restaurant, or buy up an entire shelf of inventory at the minuscule local grocery store. Sure, you pay taxes on your 3,000-square-foot “weekend getaway” house. But we pay taxes too—and we keep this joint running 365 days a year, so tourists and weekenders like you can enjoy it.

Don’t assume rural residents are “quaint” (we know you mean uneducated), or, worse, in need of “saving.” Towns in this area are home to an eclectic mix of residents—from an art director with a Ph.D., to a berry farmer with a master’s in agriculture, a fine furniture maker, a retired financial services expert, a tractor mechanic, a chef trained at the CIA, an auctioneer, and dozens of visual artists and writers.

A surefire way to be taken for a citiot: hang out only in packs of other city folk. You travel to get away from home and discover a new area, including its local culture. Why not spend some time learning about the people who make it such a worthwhile place to visit?