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Idly browsing real estate listings has become a pastime unto itself. You click through well-lit photos of homes that have been staged within an inch of their lives. But, every now and then, the cavalcade of subway tile backsplashes and mid-century modern furniture give way to something magical—a house that’s less a home and more of a Dadaist fever dream.
Occasionally the internet will come together to rubberneck to ogle at the bizarre architecture or the upsettingly robust assemblage of mannequins or a collection of Christmas decorations so sprawling the homeowners could furnish Hallmark’s annual slate of holiday movies from now until the day the sun collapses in on itself. All of this begs the question…is there any money to be made here? Here are seven infamous Zillow houses that would be successful as Airbnbs.
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Absolutely nothing creepy to see here https://t.co/unJRrUfrfM— Amanda Deibert🏳️🌈 (@amandadeibert) February 21, 2021
The Mannequin Manor
WHERE: South Lake Tahoe, California
“Absolutely nothing creepy to see here,” Twitter user @AmandaDeibert wrote while sharing the listing to this South Lake Tahoe home. Of course, if you’re inclined to accept this invitation to see something creepy you shan’t be disappointed. About halfway through the photos, it becomes clear–it’s time to call Kim Cattrall because you’ve got a mannequin situation on your hands. The living and dining area of the home has been populated with mannequins—complete with flowing wigs and gauzy dresses. Perhaps the owner owns some kind of dress shop and is storing some overstock at home? Perhaps, but that doesn’t explain the full-on “dog suit guy from The Shining” scenario lurking in the back of one of the photos which doesn’t bode well for the “reasonable explanation” you might’ve been hoping for.
Pros: This could be an intriguing spot for anyone who’s wondered how they’d do if challenged to spend a night in what is clearly a haunted house. Plus, you can’t beat that location!
The Christmas Chalet
WHERE: Colts Neck, New Jersey
“You’re not ready for this,” wrote @graceofwrath on Twitter. Indeed, even if you’ve been tipped off that this home in Colts Neck, New Jersey, features a lot of Christmas décor, truly nothing can prepare for the sheer scale merry-making accoutrements contained within this 5,420 square foot house. And we do mean scale because the first thing that greets guests upon entry is what appears to be a pair of life-sized nutcrackers soldiers. Trees, wreaths, Santas, and garlands certainly set the tone for the home where, while not every room features Christmas décor, the rest of the house does consistently give you Design Toscano vibes.
Pros: People love Christmas!
Then, things start to escalate pic.twitter.com/RqMVzmLWmp— Frankie Beverly Uncle Headass (@frazierapproves) May 18, 2020
The Versatile Venue
WHERE: Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
This listing garnered a great deal of attention that it (rightly) deserved after a thread of photos was shared by @frazierapproves on Twitter. What starts out, as advertised, as fairly unassuming quickly takes a genre-defying turn. You’ve got your medieval-themed library, a space-themed conference room, and even a beach room complete with real sand.
Pros: It’s the perfect spot for table-top game groups that can’t decide on whether they want to run a Dungeons and Dragons or a Shadowrun one-shot.
Uh. Found this in a Facebook group; the person who posted said “tour in 3D, try to find the bathtub” ...enjoy(?) https://t.co/20wOBjSUZa— Jenny Jaffe (@jennyjaffe) October 26, 2020
The Labyrinthine Lodge
WHERE: Louisville, Kentucky
Who needs a Nintendo Switch when you have…the 3D walkthrough of this Louisville Redfin listing. After finding it in a Facebook group, @jennyjaffe posted it to Twitter, writing “the person who posted said ‘tour in 3D, try to find the bathtub.’…enjoy(?)” Indeed, picking your way through the bizarrely cluttered (seriously, why are there so many Girls Gone Wild DVDs) and the unnervingly maze-like house feels like you’ve fired up a lo-fi version of the playable teaser for Silent Hills.
Pros: On-site baptismal pools to cleanse yourself of said Silent Hill vibes.
The Gothic Getaway
WHERE: Townsend, Maryland
You know how it is, one half of your party wants something Gothic while the other half wants your digs to have an atmosphere that distinctly caters to their Oakland Raiders fandom. Luckily, this Towsend, Maryland, one-bed one-bath has got you covered. Head to @zillowgonewild on Instagram for a view of the black and grayscale that comes complete with a crypt (a.k.a. shed), bar, and firepit—the perfect venue if you’re all dressed up with nowhere to go.
Pro: It’s a perfect Halloween-flavored palate cleanser for guests of the Christmas Chalet.
Joe Pesci’s house is everything I hoped Joe Pesci’s house would be. pic.twitter.com/kYOOYy9pBQ— Josh Goldbloom (@cinepocalypse) February 7, 2021
The Pesci Palace
WHERE: The Jersey Shore
“Joe Pesci’s house is everything I hoped Joe Pesci’s house would be,” wrote @cinepocalypse. The Art Deco-style Jersey Shore beach house is exactly as you’d dreamed. That is to say, outfitted with framed posters of everything in the actor’s filmography from Casino to 8 Heads in a Duffel Bag—plus a Lethal Weapon pinball machine.
Pros: It’s the Pesci Palace—truly, what else is there to say?
The Brutalist Beauty
WHERE: Newnan, Georgia
While at first glance, this Georgian house—posted to Twitter by @fatherqueerest—is a little imposing. But, once you get past the James Bond villain starkness of the interior, you realize that you could finally know what it’s like to spend the night in something reminiscent of a Mayan pyramid but with an indoor swimming pool.
Pros: As we said, a Mayan pyramid you can swim in! People would go out of their way just to stay here.